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Frequently Asked Questions on accessing Sex Services in New South Wales NSW, Australia
This resource has been developed by the Touching Base Committee for clients with disability and their personal carers. It is also recommended reading for sex workers and other adults. This section contains sexually explicit material of an adult nature.
- What is Sex Work?
- Who is a Sex Worker?
- Who is a client?
- Where do Sex Workers work?
- Do I need to go to the Worker or can the person visit me?
- Is sex work legal?
- What is the legal age of a Sex Worker in NSW?
- What is the legal age of a client in NSW?
- What is a sexual service?
- What types of sexual services are there?
- How much can I expect to pay?
- What if I arrange a service but I decide not to see the Sex Worker when we meet?
- What if I can not keep the appointment?
- What if I can't actually have sex?
- When arranging a sexual service, what do I tell the sex worker about my disability and needs?
- What will the Sex Worker wear?
- What if a Sex Worker refuses to see me?
- How do I go about finding a Sex worker?
- How safe is it to see a sex worker?
What is Sex Work?
Sex work is the CONSENSUAL exchange of money for a sexual service.
Who is a Sex Worker?
A Sex Worker is the preferred term in NSW for someone who, when paid, may provide some or all of the sexual services listed below. Previously other terms have been used including prostitute, call girl, escort, adult entertainer, good-time-girl, rent boy, massage worker or whore.
Who is a client?
Anyone who wishes to can be a client. Men, women, transgender and intersexed can all see sex workers if they so wish. A client is any person who receives a sexual service from a sex worker. This is a paid service.
Where do Sex Workers work?
Sex workers can work in a brothel, a massage parlour, in a sex worker’s house, a hotel or motel room or can go to a client’s house. A small number of sex workers find their clients by standing in certain ‘street working areas’. The service would then occur at the worker’s house, in a rented room or in the client’s car in an area that is not within view of a public place.
Do I need to go to the Worker or can the person visit me?
You can do either but it will depend upon what type of sex worker you wish to see and your individual needs and desires. It will also depend on your finances too. If you live 30 minutes away from the nearest sex worker or brothel it might be cheaper for you to go to them, rather than having to pay for their cab fare and their travelling time there and back. Some sex workers choose only to work in a brothel or from home and will not do outcalls/escort work. However, if there are access problems at the nearest brothel (ie 3 flights of stairs you cannot get up) then you may need to find a sex worker who is happy to come to your place.
- Escort – when a sex worker comes to you, whether that is to your home or a hotel room. Usually an escort offers full service though there are escorts who only offer erotic massages.
- In call / In house – when you go to the sex worker for the sexual service.
- Out call – the same as an escort service, where the sex worker will come to you to provide the service.
Is sex work legal?
YES! In NSW, since 1978 it has been legal to be a sex worker and in 1995 the act of owning and operating a brothel were decriminalised. If you would like more information around these laws, please contact SWOP via their website: www.swop.org.au.
What is the legal age of a sex worker in NSW?
18 years old for either a male, female or transgender sex worker.
What is the legal age of a client in NSW?
The client must be at least 16 yrs, however to enter a brothel (classified as a restricted premises) a client must be at least 18 yrs.
What is a sexual service?
A sexual service can include but may not be limited to the following services below. When trying to match Service to desire and budget please be aware that some services will cost more than others. Some of these services will be offered as ‘extras’ so please ask for more information if you are unsure of what services are available to you.
What types of sexual services are there?
- Erotic massage – both you and sex worker are naked and they massage your whole body including your genitals with their hands
- Body rub – same as an erotic massage
- Body slide – usually a part of an erotic massage service. When the client is naked, face down, the sex worker will slide their naked body along the client’s body
- Hand job / hand relief – the sex worker masturbates you, usually happens towards the end of an erotic massage/ body rub
- Spanish – the penis is masturbated by rubbing it between the breasts
- Oral sex – also known as French or fellatio (oral on a male), cunninglingus (oral on a female). This is where a person uses their mouth to stimulate another person’s genitals
- Full service / Fully inclusive – sex. Can also include an erotic massage and oral before having sex
- Sex / Intercourse - penetration of a penis into a vagina (when seeing a female sex worker) or a penis into a bottom (when seeing a male sex worker – see Anal sex)
- Anal sex (also known as Greek) - penetrating the anus with a penis or penis-like object
- Active / Top – male sex worker who offers penetrative anal sex BUT does not receive anal sex from the client
- Passive / Bottom – male sex worker who offers to receive penetrative anal sex BUT does not penetrate the client
- Fully Versatile – term for male sex worker who offers both active and passive services
- Tie and tease – the sex worker gently ties your hands and feet to the bed or massage table and touches your whole body without you being able to touch them. Can also incorporate the client being blindfolded for extra sensory pleasure. May also include a hand job, French and or full service
- Fantasy – can include the sex worker dressing up in a particular costume or uniform (ie. nurse/ schoolgirl/army fatigues/sportswear) and /or role-play
- Role-play – happens in a fantasy session where the client and sex worker agree on a particular scenario and play a certain role ie. the client is a headmaster and the sex worker is a naughty schoolgirl and is spanked when she gets the answers wrong in class
- B/D / Bondage and Discipline - includes being whipped, flogged, caned, tied up, told what to do when in restraints etc. Most trained sex workers who offer these services are known as Professional Mistresses or Masters. There are also special brothels just set up for these kind of services with all of the unique equipment needed ie. ropes, whips, blindfolds, manacles (handcuffs), canes, crops, suspension racks, A-frames etc. These services are sometimes of a sexual nature and sometimes not
- S/M / Sadism and Masochism – a more extreme form of B/D. Can include superficial piercing, cuttings, extreme sensory depravation, humiliation, medical scenarios etc. Most trained sex workers who offer these services are known as Professional Mistresses or Masters. There are also special brothels just set up for these kinds of services with all of the unique equipment needed ie. ropes, whips, canes, crops, suspension racks, A-frames, medical equipment, piercing equipment etc. These services are sometimes of a sexual nature and sometimes not.
Note: BDSM is often used interchangeably to describe the B/D and S/M scene as a whole.
How much can I expect to pay?
There is no set price. Just like other service industries, such as hairdressers, there is a wide variation in pricing. The cost depends on who you see, what service/s you want, where you see them and how much time you spend with a sex worker.
When booking an appointment, do make clear what service/s you want and ask if there’s a different price scale for each different service.
Payment is generally made at the beginning of the service/session. If you require a receipt please inform the sex worker or receptionist during the initial contact to ensure that they can do so.
When you want a sex worker to come to see you at your house or hotel room it is usually expected that you pay for their cab fare to and from their usual place of work. The cab fare is not included in the price of the sexual service.
Parlours, escort agencies and brothels have fixed prices for services that are not negotiable, however some private workers might be flexible as they work for themselves and decide independently on their services and prices. You can discuss your financial position with the sex worker when you are arranging an appointment with them.
What if I arrange a service but I decide not to see the Sex Worker when we meet?
- If you arrive at a parlour or brothel and the worker/s you were hoping to see are not what you were expecting you are not obliged to pay for any service and you can leave and go somewhere else. Once your session is over you should not expect to get a refund if you were not 100% happy with the service.
- With escort agencies if you are not satisfied with the person they have agreed to send out to you, you would normally have to pay a cancellation fee. This varies between agencies. You should ask at the time of the booking about their cancellation policy. For example, you may be asked to pay travel expenses.
- With private sex workers it is up to the individual worker but generally you should expect to pay a cancellation fee or the worker’s travel costs if you decide not to stay or have them stay. This price will vary from worker to worker.
What if I can not keep the appointment?
If you are feeling unwell on the day of your appointment or something else comes up which means you can not attend, let the Worker know with as much notice as possible. Generally people understand that unexpected circumstances can arise and you will probably still be able to make another booking for another day.
What if I can't actually have sex?
Sex and pleasure takes many forms and enjoying your time with a Sex Worker can happen in many ways. Penetrative sex is not the be all and end all. You may like to have a sexy massage, cuddle, or spend time with the worker exploring your own and/or their body. With a Sex Worker you can practise and explore many sexual experiences without any pressure.
When arranging a sexual service, what do I tell the sex worker about my disability and needs?
- Sex workers want every client to get the best service that they can provide. To provide a good service there may be information that is important to discuss in advance.
- Just let the sex worker or receptionist know whether you have particular requirements regarding access, transfers, undressing, communication etc. For example a receptionist or worker might think a person who has difficulties with their speech is drunk or on drugs and end the call without making an appointment.
- Let the receptionist or worker know if there will be support person in attendance helping you before or after seeing the sex worker. This might be someone who helps with un/dressing, showering, communication, positioning and transferring.
- If a medical issue could arise, it is important to tell the sex worker on how to recognise and manage this situation.
- Unfortunately many brothels, parlours and private workers’ homes are not fully accessible for people who use wheelchairs therefore accessibility options should be discussed during the initial call.
What will the Sex Worker wear?
- Generally Sex Workers providing outcalls to you arrive in a very discreet manner. They wear normal every day clothes unless you request otherwise.
- You can request the worker to wear particular items of clothing or lingerie to fulfil a fantasy eg. Housemaid, tradesman or sexy lingerie of your choice of colour.
What if a Sex Worker refuses to see me?
Sex Workers, like other professionals, specialise and prefer to work in certain areas. For example one mechanic may only do engine work and yet another may only do panel beating. Sex Workers also have specific skills and it is better to have someone see you who is comfortable and knowledgable about your needs and desires than someone who is not. If the first worker you call is not able to see you, do not be put off, as there are many other workers you can call. There might be lots of reasons why sex workers are unable to see any given client.
How do I go about finding a Sex Worker?
You can find sex workers through their adverts in:
- Most local and some daily newspapers - in the classified section under Adult Services/ Personals.
- the Yellow Pages under “A” for Adult Services and “E” for Escort Services
- the internet - when using a search engine enter key words, for example: “sex worker, male, Sydney, NSW” or “Escort, female, Newcastle, NSW” etc.
You can also locate sex workers on some streets although there are only about half a dozen such areas in all of NSW.
Also talk to your friends, carers or service providers as they may know of a suitable place or person for you.
Referral List for sex workers in NSW
The Touching Base Referral List of disability-friendly sex service providers in NSW is held at People with Disabilities Australia Inc (PWD). The Referral List contains information provided by independent sex workers and commercial sex services premises operators to be shared with clients with disabilities, and their families or support staff if required.
If you want to contact PWD to inquire about the Referral List ask to speak to the Coordinator of the Disability Rights Information Service (DRIS). The contact details of the DRIS are:
Ph: (02) 9370 3100
Freecall: 1800 422 015
Email: dris@pwd.org.au
The Coordinator is generally available between the hours of Monday to Friday, between the hours of 9:00am to 4:30pm.
How safe is it to see a sex worker?
- Sex workers in Australia have very high standards of sexual health and Sexually Transmitted Infections (STI’s) rates are one of the lowest in the world.
- When seeing a sex worker it is important to know that checking you for signs of STI’s is done by a quick genital inspection at the beginning of every service. Condoms, water-based lubricant and sometimes gloves are used to protect both the client and the sex worker from infections.
- Other ways Sex Workers maintain a high standard of sexual health is through sexual health check ups, receiving education about STIs and practicing safer sex.